Best posts made by SSmith1226

A man goes into a bar and asks the bartender, “If I show you the most amazing thing you’ve ever seen will you let me drink for free tonight?” The bartender says, “Let me see and I’ll consider it.”

So the man reaches into his bag and pulls out a miniature piano and a hamster. The hamster sits in front of the piano and starts playing, and not just chopsticks but Chopin, some ragtime and even some rock’n’roll.

After a few minutes the bartender says “Okay, I’m impressed, you can drink for free.” As the bartender is pouring the man a drink the man says, “Hey, if I show you something even more amazing will you let me drink for free for a month?”

The bartender says, “Okay, but this had better be spectacular.” So the man reaches into his bag and pulls out a microphone and a frog. The frog sits in front of the microphone and begins singing along with the hamster playing the piano.

The bartender says, “Okay, you can drink here for free for a month.”

Another customer at the end of the bar has been watching. He walks over and says, “I’m a theater producer and I’d like to buy that frog and put him in a show. Will you sell it to me for $500?” The man says no, so the producer offers to buy the frog for $5000, and the man agrees.

As the producer leaves with the frog the bartender says, “I can’t believe you sold the frog! It was worth more.” “Not really” the man says, “The hamster is a ventriloquist.”

This is a perfect site to post this photo. We all have thought of using a Crown Royal bag as a mute. Now you can repurpose all those Crown Royal bags that you collected and not as of yet found an application to use as a mute.

I bet that you didn’t know that you could turn guns into trumpets. Here is how it is done:

New Orleans trumpeter Shamarr Allen wanted to find a way to get guns out of kids' hands, so he turned to what he knows best: music. He recently created a gun-for-trumpet exchange program — called Trumpet Is My Weapon — and has so far collected four guns that he turned over to police.

"I had some trumpets lying around, and I know for me, the trumpet saved me," he says.

Allen, who's from the city's Lower Ninth Ward, started the program after learning about Devante Bryant, 9, was fatally shot in front of his 7th Ward home earlier this month.

"I have a nine-year-old son, so for me it just hit me different," Allen says.

So he posted on social media: "To all the youth in New Orleans, Bring me a gun and I'll give you a trumpet no questions asked."

Allen says it is important to him that the kids who come to his exchange feel safe.

"I wanted to build a relationship and trust with the kids so that they wouldn't have to worry about getting in any trouble," he says....

If you are interested the full story and a recorded intervirw can be found at the following site.

https://www.npr.org/2020/07/24/895123707/to-help-keep-new-orleans-safe-musician-trades-kids-trumpets-for-guns

ACRONYMS FOR THE OVER 65 CROWD
The "kids" have all their little SMS ( Short Message Service ) codes, like BFF, WTF, LOL, etc. So here are some codes for us more mature texters.

ATD - At the Doctor's
BFF - Best Friends Funeral
BTW - Bring the Wheelchair
FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
GGPBL - Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
GHA - Got Heartburn Again
HGBM - Had Good Bowel Movement
IMHO - Is My Hearing-Aid On?
WAITT - Who Am I Talking To?
GGLKI - Gotta Go, Laxative Kickin In!

See whether you can add to this. For example,
DSMPETM- Didn’t sleep much, peed every thirty minutes
GCKM- Gas and constipation killing me!
CFMK- Cant find my keys
NMTIMH- Never mind, they’re in my hand

@tjcombo
From the 2019 Movie with the same name:

In the place of a full public Veterans Day Concert, I participated in a local video production which I recorded and edited for the “Sound Dunes Swing Ensemble Combo” in East Dennis, Massachusetts (Cape Cod). The organization is under the direction of fellow trumpeter, Jim Stamboni. The full band is a “Big Band”, but with Covid this is as large as it can get with social distancing. This musical program, honoring Veterans, as well as Service Members, was completed and released yesterday on YouTube. Amazingly it has received 272 views in the 36 hours since posting by word of mouth. The members of this group are all community minded amateurs. This video comprises the second and third (last) rehearsal for today’s Covid limited attendance outdoor private event honoring Veterans and Service Members at a location on Cape Cod.

I wasn’t sure whether to post this here or under Medical Concerns. Every year from around November 1 through January 15, I suffer through this same malady, which this year is exceptionally worse due to the pandemic situation. I feel trapped! Every day is like Groundhog day in my household. Oh, the horror of it all....
The following video explains it all better than I can express it.

@ssmith1226 said in A little humour:

@bigdub said in A little humour:

2 is diffrrent.

Other than every chicken “is different”, number three has been colored in, but number 2 has three toes on its right foot, while the others do not.
I stand with number 2 is different ( not “diffrrent”)

@bigdub

Sorry! Maybe this will put the humor back into it:
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

Because if it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan!

@tjcombo
You must be very Devo-ted to this breed.

@barliman2001
Welcome Back barliman2001!!!

@bigdub

@barliman2001 said in Funny story that's sort of trumpet related...:

I once sat next to Wynton Marsalis.

At breakfast.

When I was in college in the late 1960’s, during a concert, I got to stand next to Freddie Hubbard, talk, and perform with him.

Of course it was during intermission in the mens room. Our performance, by the way, was a duet version of “Handel’s Water Music”.

In this day and age of wokeness, it is about time trumpet players get the utmost respect, which obviously they deserve. Without the trumpet section most bands sound like crap, unless it is a ukulele band, They sound like crap, with or without a trumpet section.
The following are the do’s and don’s of addressing a trumpet player with respect. You can pass this chart out to your bandmates so they address us in the proper manner.

The Wall Street Journal featured an article with the above name. Miles Davis’s final home, which he owned from 1985 until his death in 1991 is for sale. This is your chance to own a piece of Jazz history, in Malibu, no less, for only $15,000,000.
Another alternative, based on the rough calculation that Trumpet Boards has about 430 members signed up would be, if we all chipped in $35,000, we could purchase the house free and clear and make it the “TrumpetBoards.Com World Headquarters”. I would be happy to live on site to make sure the beach was properly raked to a smooth texture and the tide kept on schedule.
The link to the full article is below.

https://www.wsj.com/articles/all-that-jazz-miles-daviss-onetime-california-home-asks-15-million-11644866421

The sign below it’s in the parking lot of a boutique trumpet shop called “Jamie’s Trumpet Gallery” in Melbourne, Florida. Jamie, who is. Jazz Trumpet player herself and superb vocalist, deals in high end trumpets and flugelhorns with an emphasis in horns used in Jazz. You will not find student horns there, or for that matter, Piccolo Trumpets. C Trumpets etc. Among the high end brands there you will find new Taylor Custom Trumpets and Flugelhorns, as well as Inderbinen, and some high end trumpets on consignment. Today I played Taylors, a Inderbinen Wood Flugelhorn, Schagerls, Monettes, Martins, Olds Mendez etc. There were many I didn’t play., including Benge, Bach, and Conn, etc.
The store is well worth visiting in person or on line. The web address is:

https://jamiestrumpetgallery.com/