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    Best posts made by SSmith1226

    • RE: A little humour

      Patrick walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the corner of the room, drinking a sip out of each pint in turn. When he’s finished all three, he goes back to the bar and orders three more.

      “You know a pint goes flat soon after I pull it,” he says. “Your pints would taste better if you bought one at a time.”

      Patrick replies: “Well now, I have two brothers, one is in America and the other in Australia and here I am in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days we all drank together.”

      The barman admits that this is a nice custom and says no more.
      Patrick becomes a regular customer and always drinks the same way, ordering three pints and drinking a sip out of each in turn, until they are finished. One day, he comes in and orders just two pints. All the other regulars in the bar notice and fall silent. When he goes back to the bar for the second round, the barman says: “I don’t want to intrude on your grief but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss.”

      Patrick looks confused for a moment, then the penny drops and he starts to laugh. “Oh no,” he says, “Everyone is fine! It’s me … I’ve quit drinking!”

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      A young Scottish lad and lassie were sitting on a low stone wall, holding hands and gazing out at the Loch.

      They sat in silence for several minutes before the girl looked at the boy.

      “A penny for your thoughts, Angus,” she said.

      “Well, I was thinking. Perhaps it’s about time for a wee kiss,” he replied.

      The girl blushed but gave Angus a kiss on his cheek.

      The two then turned back to the Loch and continued to sit in silence again.

      “Another penny for your thoughts, Angus,” the girl said.

      Angus thought for a moment or two and looked concerned.
      “Well, my thoughts are a bit more serious this time,” he finally replied.

      “Really?” the girl asked. “Why?”

      “Do you think it’s about time you paid me that first penny?”

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: How about a "Random Meaningless Image...let's see them string"?

      @Vulgano-Brother

      If Ansel had an iPhone, he would have never had to get out of his car. He could have taken his photos like I did behind the wheel, and through the windshield, on the Florida Turnpike, with one hand.

      Key Largo Sunset along US 1:

      FB69F652-EBAD-47E9-B4BF-D0E20DC55F36.jpeg

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: How about a "Random Meaningless Image...let's see them string"?

      @Vulgano-Brother said in How about a "Random Meaningless Image...let's see them string"?:

      5861ed88-1d71-498f-bb43-e175b9d839d0-image.png

      0D8E4AE7-ED5B-4048-9FAB-236851058A76.png

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      A man goes into a bar and asks the bartender, “If I show you the most amazing thing you’ve ever seen will you let me drink for free tonight?” The bartender says, “Let me see and I’ll consider it.”

      So the man reaches into his bag and pulls out a miniature piano and a hamster. The hamster sits in front of the piano and starts playing, and not just chopsticks but Chopin, some ragtime and even some rock’n’roll.

      After a few minutes the bartender says “Okay, I’m impressed, you can drink for free.” As the bartender is pouring the man a drink the man says, “Hey, if I show you something even more amazing will you let me drink for free for a month?”

      The bartender says, “Okay, but this had better be spectacular.” So the man reaches into his bag and pulls out a microphone and a frog. The frog sits in front of the microphone and begins singing along with the hamster playing the piano.

      The bartender says, “Okay, you can drink here for free for a month.”

      Another customer at the end of the bar has been watching. He walks over and says, “I’m a theater producer and I’d like to buy that frog and put him in a show. Will you sell it to me for $500?” The man says no, so the producer offers to buy the frog for $5000, and the man agrees.

      As the producer leaves with the frog the bartender says, “I can’t believe you sold the frog! It was worth more.” “Not really” the man says, “The hamster is a ventriloquist.”

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: How about a "Random Meaningless Image...let's see them string"?

      This is a perfect site to post this photo. We all have thought of using a Crown Royal bag as a mute. Now you can repurpose all those Crown Royal bags that you collected and not as of yet found an application to use as a mute.

      92E61EDF-0A33-49ED-B4A6-E87FCA322C20.jpeg

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: How about a "Random Meaningless Image...let's see them string"?

      A92D684D-E17B-487A-97EA-E2E2EA9EE6A2.jpeg

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • Turning Guns into Trumpets

      I bet that you didn’t know that you could turn guns into trumpets. Here is how it is done:

      New Orleans trumpeter Shamarr Allen wanted to find a way to get guns out of kids' hands, so he turned to what he knows best: music. He recently created a gun-for-trumpet exchange program — called Trumpet Is My Weapon — and has so far collected four guns that he turned over to police.

      "I had some trumpets lying around, and I know for me, the trumpet saved me," he says.

      Allen, who's from the city's Lower Ninth Ward, started the program after learning about Devante Bryant, 9, was fatally shot in front of his 7th Ward home earlier this month.

      "I have a nine-year-old son, so for me it just hit me different," Allen says.

      So he posted on social media: "To all the youth in New Orleans, Bring me a gun and I'll give you a trumpet no questions asked."

      Allen says it is important to him that the kids who come to his exchange feel safe.

      "I wanted to build a relationship and trust with the kids so that they wouldn't have to worry about getting in any trouble," he says....

      If you are interested the full story and a recorded intervirw can be found at the following site.

      https://www.npr.org/2020/07/24/895123707/to-help-keep-new-orleans-safe-musician-trades-kids-trumpets-for-guns

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      ACRONYMS FOR THE OVER 65 CROWD
      The "kids" have all their little SMS ( Short Message Service ) codes, like BFF, WTF, LOL, etc. So here are some codes for us more mature texters.

      ATD - At the Doctor's
      BFF - Best Friends Funeral
      BTW - Bring the Wheelchair
      FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
      GGPBL - Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
      GHA - Got Heartburn Again
      HGBM - Had Good Bowel Movement
      IMHO - Is My Hearing-Aid On?
      WAITT - Who Am I Talking To?
      GGLKI - Gotta Go, Laxative Kickin In!

      See whether you can add to this. For example,
      DSMPETM- Didn’t sleep much, peed every thirty minutes
      GCKM- Gas and constipation killing me!
      CFMK- Cant find my keys
      NMTIMH- Never mind, they’re in my hand

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      @tjcombo
      From the 2019 Movie with the same name:

      A8B6E4D0-14DE-4DEB-939C-C0EC077D73E7.jpeg

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • Veterans Day Concert

      In the place of a full public Veterans Day Concert, I participated in a local video production which I recorded and edited for the “Sound Dunes Swing Ensemble Combo” in East Dennis, Massachusetts (Cape Cod). The organization is under the direction of fellow trumpeter, Jim Stamboni. The full band is a “Big Band”, but with Covid this is as large as it can get with social distancing. This musical program, honoring Veterans, as well as Service Members, was completed and released yesterday on YouTube. Amazingly it has received 272 views in the 36 hours since posting by word of mouth. The members of this group are all community minded amateurs. This video comprises the second and third (last) rehearsal for today’s Covid limited attendance outdoor private event honoring Veterans and Service Members at a location on Cape Cod.

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      I wasn’t sure whether to post this here or under Medical Concerns. Every year from around November 1 through January 15, I suffer through this same malady, which this year is exceptionally worse due to the pandemic situation. I feel trapped! Every day is like Groundhog day in my household. Oh, the horror of it all....
      The following video explains it all better than I can express it.

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      @ssmith1226 said in A little humour:

      @bigdub said in A little humour:

      C5CE9D9E-1246-4A96-A208-794F20FA7C53.jpeg

      2 is diffrrent.

      Other than every chicken “is different”, number three has been colored in, but number 2 has three toes on its right foot, while the others do not.
      I stand with number 2 is different ( not “diffrrent”)

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      @bigdub

      Sorry! Maybe this will put the humor back into it:
      Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

      Because if it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan!

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: How about a "Random Meaningless Image...let's see them string"?

      2A946A13-F6EC-496E-9262-DC304494376D.jpeg A53389CB-0B48-4CE1-B35F-096F76EF4683.jpeg

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      @tjcombo
      You must be very Devo-ted to this breed.

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      @barliman2001
      Welcome Back barliman2001!!!

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      6B12CDB7-A864-489E-9716-FDCCAEB01614.jpeg

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      @bigdub

      EB879B2B-B169-49A1-8958-FAC13414CBA2.jpeg

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
    • RE: A little humour

      3A01ACEA-5898-44EC-879A-EF98B3C066DA.jpeg

      posted in Lounge
      SSmith1226
      SSmith1226
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