Spoiler alert:These are not going to be very good. I warned you.
Where's the capital of Alaska, juno?
What did the Swiss conductor say in the middle of practice?
What’s the Matterhorn?
Name the largest ocean. Be pacific.
What do they call French doors in France?
Do they call apple pie American?
Take baseball. I have a lot to say about that.
@administrator said in A little humour:
@BigDub said in A little humour:
@Mike-Ansberry said in A little humour:
Gotta steal this one.
Rest assured, 99.9% of jokes are stolen. IMHO
Well, they had to be original at some point, so let me adjust that figure.........”most” jokes are stolen.I have yet to hear an "original joke." Get it? ... probably not.
???
Here’s an original joke for you-
ADAM: knock, knock
EVE: who's there?
ADAM: Who do you think?
Oops, forgot I was going to post this, too!
( one of my all time favorite far sides, and there are many )
@Dale-Proctor said in Hello! Welcome to TB, who are you?:
@N1684T said in Hello! Welcome to TB, who are you?:
I found a copy of American Drummer Boy on Ebay. Love civil war stuff.....
I ran across this screen shot of me playing Eb cornet in the movie. That’s me on the end by the stair.
I think you looked like you were about a half a beat off, there, Dale.
Just kidding
I would like to hear if you think this is done. I am leaning heavily toward yes, myself. Also I know what the client wants, and you don’t, necessarily....here it is as of today.
The story about this, without naming any names, Is that the Client's uncle owned this farm near Rockford, IL. He passed away a number of years ago and the client wants to give this to his own father ( older brother of the owner of this farm ).
The farm has since been sold, hence, the sentimental value of the gesture.
@Mike-Ansberry said in A little humour:
Gotta steal this one.
Rest assured, 99.9% of jokes are stolen. IMHO
Well, they had to be original at some point, so let me adjust that figure.........”most” jokes are stolen.
@Dr-GO said in Artist on BOARD:
@BigDub If my daughter can get a pic of her doggie in to me, I may have another job for you to be completed by Christmas if that is possible.
Yup. Yessir. Very possible, Lord willing. The better the photo.......you know...the better job I can do.
The current Commision I am working on. Here is a series of shots showing the progression of what steps I go through, though this isn’t necessarily the same for every painting I do. This one, however is being done this way. There were several more drawings to determine how I wanted to lay out the design and positioning of everything. 
@Newell-Post said in A little humour:
Pun, n. A form of wit, to which wise men stoop and fools aspire.
— Ambrose Bierce
And which in many cases can cause wincing and eye rolls. A sure indication of a good pun. Also, the recipients are unwilling to admit when a pun is good, neither. Haha.
@Dr-GO said in A little humour:
@Tobylou8 said in A little humour:
I always wanted to open my own pastry shop..... but I could never raise the dough!
I am a part owner of one... Was able to contribute enough bread to finalize the investment which turned out to be the icing on the cake. Stop by any time. It's just yeast of the flour shop.
Made a killing on donut holes, as I convinced the customers, the holes have no calories.
I might try to roll by and give you some business. It’s the yeast I could do. All I knead is the address. Piece of cake. Easy as pie.
If I don’t make it, that’s the way the cookie crumbles.
@Tobylou8 said in A little humour:
I always wanted to open my own pastry shop..... but I could never raise the dough!
I kneaded that kind of humor, or, humour if you please
Mrs Anderson, grandmotherly woman was teaching the kindergarten class in Sunday School about Noah and the Ark. She told them how only 8 people were on the Ark, and no one else survived the great flood.
Little Johnny stared at her with a very perplexed look on his face. The teacher called on him and asked if there was a question, since he had such a concerned look on his face.
Yes, he said. I do have a question. “ Mrs Anderson?”
Yes? she said.
Hesitatingly he said, “How ever did you survive, then?”
I hope you all don’t mind me sharing another one I just finished today? This one of a farm, early morning, in Oldwick, NJ. About 25 minutes from me
Kia Motors and Apple are going to embark on a joint venture where car buyers can assemble their own vehicles and enjoy tremendous savings in the process.
They'll most likely call it iKia, or IKEA, not sure what the spelling will be.
@motteatoj said in Selmer "Louis Armstrong Special" Trumpet 1932 EXTREMELY RARE - Fully Restored $2700.00:
can anyone tell me what i did wrong uploading pictures? new here and not sure why they are not showing.
With my iPad, I use the very far right icon with the arrow pointing up, go to my photo library and click the one I want to use. You do, however, need to make the file small enough. Larger files will not work. I have an app I use to change the size of the files very easily. It is called Resizer
