Most of those responsible for TV shows and motion pictures just don't care about these things, or don't have a clue, or both. I was once in a casting for a DHL ad where the casting agency deliberately wanted a homely-looking trumpet player to perform "Ain't no mountain high enough" as a finish to a clip showing all the way a trumpet takes from a factory in backwoods China to the trumpet player in Vienna.
I won the casting - but did not get to make the ad, because DHL had by then found "the perfect looking guy" amongst their own workforce, and wanted me to show the guy how to simulate playing to a playback recording.
I walked out on them.
Best posts made by barliman2001
-
RE: Phony players
-
RE: Fast Tempo and old farts
For many years, I had a similar problem - fast fingerings were a nightmare. Then, I bought a cheap euphonium and started playing that in a local band. And hey presto! suddenly I was able to play much faster... seems the fear of fast fingerings on trumpet hindered my practising, and with the euph, that was gone. And now is gone for trumpet as well.
-
RE: A little humour
John entered a Covid-19 Vaccine Centre and was given his first dose.
On the way home, he found he had suddenly developed severe vision problems. So he called the vaccine centre to ask whether he should see his doctor or go straight into hospital.
"Don't go to the doctor OR the hospital. Your only chance is to return here and collect the glasses you forgot!" -
RE: Trumpet won’t play
Our dear friend Gordon once sent me a gift package with several cornets in it: A Buescher Aristocrat that to this day is my main axe in jazz, an Elkhart by Buescher that's middle of the road but unusual for its pig's tail wrap, and a King Tempo that was absolutely airtight. I tried everything - washing through, snake, spitballs... nothing worked. Finally, in desperation, I gave it to Votruba's. And they put their endoscope inside and as a result unsoldered the bell. What did they find? An ancient wad of chewing gum that someone had rammed down the bell.
-
RE: A little humour
Vienna, Austria
Traffic lights beside the Opera.
A tourist in a hired car is so entranced by the sight he misses the green light.
A Viennese stops by, winds down the window and calls out, "Your colour didn't come up, did it?" -
RE: What Are You Doing New Years, New Years Eve
Playing a New Year's Eve Ball with Big Band Markus Fluhr www.bbmf.de, and then several weeks of assisting my wife with "Countess Mariza", done by the touring operetta company she has just wormed herself into to such an extent that the present owner wants to retire and hand over the company to her... then a concert with the Vienna Lakeside Music Academy Symphony Orchestra - music from animation movies - and then a few Carnival gigs.
-
RE: A little humour
@tjcombo Two English gentlemen are sitting beside a river, fishing. Suddenly, one rod twitches, and the relevant gentleman pulls a beautiful mermaid from the waters. He regards her for a long time, then throws her back into the river.
Some time later, his companion asks, "Why?"
The answer? "How?" -
RE: KT revisited
@j-jericho More like a botfly - you know, the things they pull out of cats' noses on Youtube...
-
My collection...
As I am enjoying a leisure moment, I have begun a list of every instrument I ever owned... not in chronological order. And I've decided that you out there, my trumpet friends, should be allowed to share this info.
Please do not see this as boasting, but as plain information.
I am including the fate of each instrument whenever it has decided to move on.Bb trumpets:
Comet ***
UMI King Silver Flair Dizzy Bell (sold)
Jupiter STR-1010, with one straight and one Dizzy Bell, and an adapted Schilke BERYLLIUM bell (sold)
Jupiter 840 (sold)
Dowids Jazzline (sold)
Stomvi Elite Bb (sold)
Ganter G5 (exchanged for G7)
Ganter G7 custom (sold)
Olds Ambassador (given to a friend as present)
Olds Special (returned to original seller as he after the deal could not bear to part with it)
Olds Studio (for sale at Votruba's in Vienna)
Olds Recording
Courtois Balanced
Buescher Aristocrat 265
Conn International (Amati stencil)
Selmer K-Modified (stolen in burglary in Ireland)
UMI Benge #7 (for sale at Votruba's in Vienna)
Buescher #9
Buescher #11 with quick change to A (stolen in burglary in Ireland)Pocket Bb trumpets:
Jupiter, small bell (sold)
Stomvi Forte (sold)
Arnold & Sons (Jupiter clone)C trumpets:
Bach Strad 239, with additional slides in Bb and Ab (stolen in Munich)
Bach Strad rotary C (stolen in burglary in Ireland)
Stomvi Elite (sold)
Couesnon Bb/C (for sale at Votruba's in Vienna)
Gaudet CD trumpets:
DEG Signature (re-sold within two weeks)
Ganter G3 (sold)
Stomvi Elite (sold)
CourtoisEb trumpets:
Stomvi (sold)F trumpet:
Bach Strad (sold)G picc:
Scherzer (sold)
1966 SelmerBb/A picc:
1967 Selmer (sold)
1979 Selmer (sold)
Besson Kanstul 920 (sold, very much regretted)
Stomvi Elite (sold)
Votruba Professional (stolen in Vienna, found and destroyed by police on suspicion of being a bomb)
ACB DoublerBb cornets:
Weltklang, with custom made Ab slides (sold)
Ganter Custom (sold)
Besson Imperial (in need of restoration)
Stomvi Elite (sold)
Ganter rotary cornet (returned to H. Ganter for private collection)
Besson International (2x)
Buescher Aristocrat 264
Jupiter student cornet (sold)
Elkhart by Buescher (for sale at Votruba's in Vienna)
Blessing Artist (present to my Scottish godchild)
Unnamed 1880s HP cornet, with personal engravingEb cornets:
Besson Imperial (in need of restoration)
B&H Sovereign Round Stamp bell-tuned Soprano (2x, one stolen in burglary in Ireland, the other sold)
Ganter CustomFlugelhorns:
Ganter G15 (sold)
Votruba Profi (sold)
Courtois 154R
Thomann "Black Jazz" (sold within a week)
Clemens August Glier Kuhlohorn (almost sold...)I think that's it... enjoy.
-
RE: A little humour
"Student, how would you define a Minor Second?" -
"Two clarinets in unison, sir." -
RE: A little humour
@dr-go That sounds rather like the explanation I gave to a group of Texan tourists when guiding them through the Golden Hall at Passau City Hall... There is a very large painting of the wedding of an Austrian Emperor to a Bavarian Princess, and I asked them whether they knew that the fact that the Emperor married in Passau was directly responsible for US Independence? No? Ok, here's the reason. If the Emperor had not married there, he would not have known about the Mariahilf Monastery there. He could not have made a pilgrimage there to pray for victory over the Turks (we're talking 17th cent. here). In consequence, he could not have defeated the Turks and would not have captured their camp. Therefore he would not have found the first bags of coffee in Europe. Without the coffee... there would not have been coffee houses in Vienna. And without them, there would not have been Edward Lloyd's Vienna Coffee House in Boston, Mass., where the conspirators for the Boston Tea Party used to meet and plot. And thus what is now the US would still be a group of English colonies... Long faces, "We didn't know thaaaat..." and the sounds of chins dropping to the polished marble floor... and a couple of English tourists were laughing their heads off...
-
RE: I always knew Trombones were frightening instruments
Trombones have their uses in pretending you are something you are not...
-
RE: A little humour
@ssmith1226 However, by cleverly combining some, you will be able to get astounding results:
-
A piece of toast will always fall onto the buttered side
-
A cat always falls on its feet.
So you take a cat, liberally coat its back with butter and throw it down. It will try to fall on its feet, but then the buttered side would be uppermost, so the resulting reaction will cause the cat to hover a foot or so above ground and rotate faster and faster, until you can connect a crankshaft to the cat and drive a generator.
-
-
RE: Mute Musings
@Rapier232 said in Mute Musings:
Mutes, the bane of my life. Most of my playing is in theatre pit bands. I’ve probably spent more money on mutes for shows than I’ve been paid. Hat mute, Cleartone, metal and fibre straight mutes, metal and fibre cups, plunger, felt mute, even an extra Harmon because there wasn’t enough time to remove and replace stem between use. Sometimes I feel more like a juggler than a trumpet player. Why those that write scores don’t understand the player’s time requirements is a mystery. The puzzled face of an MD when you ask "Do you want this passage with a cup, or straight? Because you can’t have both. I physically cannot change mutes on a quaver rest".
Many of these parts were originally written for two players. One to play the straight, and the other to continue with the cup. Unfortunately, modern orchestras don't work that way.
-
RE: Yuck
My best buy ever was a Besson International Cornet which I watched being put into a garbage bin... pulled it out, asked the guy whether I could have it. He said, You're welcome to it, and I walked off. Had it restored for a mere 75 Deutschmarks (now approx. € 30) and have been playing it ever since. Last time someone offered to buy it I was tempted with three thousand dollars... and declined. You don't sell a good cornet.
-
European Folklore Festival - Coronation Brass
The European Folklore Festival in Bitburg, Germany, is an annual event of some considerable size with a remarkable 50+-year tradition. Groups from all over the world meet and show off their skills - great stuff.
Traditionally, some of the music is always provided by Welsh brass band Coronation Brass, a scratch formation meeting once a year in Bitburg and playing up to eight gigs over a four-day period. No rehearsal - just plain sight-reading one minor test piece and lots of marches (no marching!) and old favourites, with a tasty selection from the cheeseboard.
For the last years, Coronation Brass have been welcoming guest players from all over the world... me, for one (I've already managed to worm myself into the inner circle), and there were players from Germany, Italy, Russia and the US...
It's always great fun - great music, great people, free meals and floods of free drinks (main sponsor is Bitburger, one of the largest breweries in Germany!). ssmith1226 attended one festival, and a year later he wrote, "my liver still remembers!"This year's event will be smaller than usual, more like a local affair, but Coronation Brass have been confirmed as participants and are inviting brass band players to join them for a long weekend of music and mayhem.
The Dates:
Arrival in Bitburg Friday, 8 July, 2022, lunchtime
Concerts - most of them open-air, in the centre of town - from Friday evening until Monday morning
Departure after breakfast Tuesday, 12 JulyBitburg is fairly easily reached by car, and is within reach of both Frankfurt and Frankfurt-Hahn airports. Airport pick-ups can be arranged, and for those travelling from the UK, there will be free seats in cars.
Accommodation traditionally is in a 3-star hotel in the centre of town, just 50 metres from the main concert venue... cost is likely to be at most € 250 for the whole period including large breakfasts (that's the upper figure - Coronation Brass usually get special rates and sponsoring. At the last pre-lockdown festival, cost per nose was € 180.)
Contact me for details, or apply directly to Nick Jones (organizing genius, and trombone wizard) at coronationbrass@hotmail.com
See a few pics from previous festivals...
Yep, that's me as flag-bearer.The umbrellas in the background belong to the band hotel...
Fellow participants from Slovakia, with a tromboline
Bitburg's Mayor conducting Coronation Brass (he's a Euph player of note and has been known to join the band for a few pieces)
Music and drinks!
Street food
Folk dance group from a Swedish Seniors' Residence - the youngest member is 87, the oldest 101 years old
-
RE: RIP Trumpet "Master"
@Newell-Post I've got his e-mail and will send him a note. Haven't heard from him for some time, though, and he was living in a particularly lively corner of Africa...