A little humour
-
It took me a moment. Funny.
(Wish I was a cat.)
-
Sorry...I think that one needed to be deleted...although I didn't really look too closely anyway!
-
A recent news story about the famous “Villages” community in Central Florida:
Florida Woman Stops Alligator Attack Using a Small Beretta Pistol
This is a story of self-control and marksmanship by a brave, cool-headed woman with a small pistol against a fierce predator. What's the smallest caliber that you would trust to protect yourself? Here's her story in her own words:
“While out walking along the edge of a pond just outside my house in ‘The Villages’ with my soon to be ex-husband, discussing property settlement and other divorce issues, we were surprised by a huge 12-ft. alligator which suddenly emerged from the murky water and began charging us with its large jaws wide open. She must have been protecting her nest because she was extremely aggressive.”“If I had not had my little Beretta .25 caliber pistol with me, I would not be here today!”
“Just one shot to my estranged husband's knee cap was all it took. The gator got him easily, and I was able to escape by just walking away at a brisk pace. The amount I saved in lawyer's fees was really incredible, and his life insurance was a real big bonus!”
-
-
-
Yogi Berra explains Jazz.
Interviewer: Can you explain jazz?
Yogi: I can't, but I will. 90% of all jazz is half improvisation. The other half is the part people play while others are playing something they never played with anyone who played that part. So if you play the wrong part, its right. If you play the right part, it might be right if you play it wrong enough. But if you play it too right, it's wrong.
Interviewer: I don't understand.
Yogi: Anyone who understands jazz knows that you can't understand it. It's too complicated. That's what's so simple about it.
Interviewer: Do you understand it?
Yogi: No. That's why I can explain it. If I understood it, I wouldn't know anything about it.
Interviewer: Are there any great jazz players alive today?
Yogi: No. All the great jazz players alive today are dead. Except for the ones that are still alive. But so many of them are dead, that the ones that are still alive are dying to be like the ones that are dead. Some would kill for it.
Interviewer: What is syncopation?
Yogi: That's when the note that you should hear now happens either before or after you hear it. In jazz, you don't hear notes when they happen because that would be some other type of music. Other types of music can be jazz, but only if they're the same as something different from those other kinds.
Interviewer: Now I really don't understand.
Yogi: I haven't taught you enough for you to not understand jazz that well.
-
-
@Niner said in A little humour:
Yogi Berra explains Jazz.
Interviewer: Can you explain jazz?
Yogi: I can't, but I will. 90% of all jazz is half improvisation. The other half is the part people play while others are playing something they never played with anyone who played that part. So if you play the wrong part, its right. If you play the right part, it might be right if you play it wrong enough. But if you play it too right, it's wrong.
Interviewer: I don't understand.
Yogi: Anyone who understands jazz knows that you can't understand it. It's too complicated. That's what's so simple about it.
Interviewer: Do you understand it?
Yogi: No. That's why I can explain it. If I understood it, I wouldn't know anything about it.
Interviewer: Are there any great jazz players alive today?
Yogi: No. All the great jazz players alive today are dead. Except for the ones that are still alive. But so many of them are dead, that the ones that are still alive are dying to be like the ones that are dead. Some would kill for it.
Interviewer: What is syncopation?
Yogi: That's when the note that you should hear now happens either before or after you hear it. In jazz, you don't hear notes when they happen because that would be some other type of music. Other types of music can be jazz, but only if they're the same as something different from those other kinds.
Interviewer: Now I really don't understand.
Yogi: I haven't taught you enough for you to not understand jazz that well.
Once again, Yogi is credited with not saying anything about something he knew nothing about.
-
You guys realize that 98% of the Yogi Berra quotes were actually made up by his childhood buddy, Joe Garagiola, and attributed to Yogi, don't you? It was a shtick they started perpetrating in little league, and kept working the rest of their lives. Joe was a chatterbox and Yogi was almost non-verbal.
-
-
@BigDub I left off part of that maybe it happened and maybe it didn't interview with Yogi:
Interviewer: What do you expect is in store for the future of jazz trumpet?
Yogi: I'm thinkin' there'll be a group of guys who've never met talkin' about it all the time...
Now that's profound you got to admit.
https://www.allaboutjazz.com/yogi-berra-explains-jazz-by-aaj-staff.php
-
Now I'm really confused Boo Boo!
-
Some Other Yogi quotes.
When driving to Cooperstown with Whitey Ford and their wives after Whitey said he thought they were lost, Yogi said, “yeah, but we're making good time”
When asked how many slices he wanted his own small pizza to be cut into, 6 or 8, he said, better make it 6, I don't think I can eat 8 slices.
When playing the game 20 questions on the train, his first 2 questions were always: 1. is this person alive?
2. Is this person dead?
“ Nobody eats at that place anymore, it’s too crowded”
“ when you come to the fork in the road, take it”
“ Pair up in threes and do laps around the outfield”
“ it gets late out in left field early at that stadium”
In response to Mayor John Lindsey's wife telling Yogi he didn’t seem to be bothered by the heat at all: “ You don’t look so hot yourself” he said. -
I forgot one of his most profound quotes:
Baseball is 90% physical, and half mental.
And one more, when someone would ask him what time it was, he'd say, "you mean now?" -
When I lived in St. Louis, I caught the "Yogi and Joe" show, live, a couple of time. (Although they were both old men at the time.) On one occasion, my boss was getting his "star on the walk of fame" (or at least the St. Louis equivalent.) Yogi and Joe were the guests of honor and past recipients. The other guest of honor and past recipient was Chuck Berry.
When it was Yogi's turn to speak, he got up and (haltingly) said: "Youse know what I always sez..... When you comes to a fork in the road...... Take it!"
And then Joe jumps up, grabs the mic, and says: "Yeah. Now let me tell you the other 50 things Yogi said this morning. Blah. Blah. Blah....."
Of course Joe was drunk and he then started telling somewhat racist jokes. Bad move Joe. In front of a St. Louis crowd with Chuck Berry sitting there, I thought he was going to get his ass kicked on the spot, even if he was 75 years old.
-
Great advertising campaign
-
In order to keep this “semi-relevant” I should point out that featured subject of this video, Ramiro Gonzalez-Ganzales, AKA Pedro Gonzalez-Gonzalez, according to his Wikipedia Biography, was the son of a trumpet player. Now that we got that out of the way, he became a movie, television, and a cartoon voiceover actor after he was discovered by John Wayne when he appeared as a contestant on Groucho Marx’s show, “You Bet Your Life”. His career opened up acting careers and opportunities for many other actors of Mexican origin...
Here is the appearance that launched his career. -
@SSmith1226 said in A little humour:
In order to keep this “semi-relevant” I should point out that featured subject of this video, Ramiro Gonzalez-Ganzales, AKA Pedro Gonzalez-Gonzalez, according to his Wikipedia Biography, was the son of a trumpet player. Now that we got that out of the way, he became a movie, television, and a cartoon voiceover actor after he was discovered by John Wayne when he appeared as a contestant on Groucho Marx’s show, “You Bet Your Life”. His career opened up acting careers and opportunities for many other actors of Mexican origin...
Here is the appearance that launched his career.It was never a mistake who Groucho Marx put on his program. Without these oddball characters it would have been rather dull. He certainly played off them, though!
-
-