A little humour
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Let me start by saying, this was an actual real dream I had. Fair warning, if you don’t want to go too far inside my subconscious, then stop reading this right now! Ok, you have been warned, so here goes:
In my dream, it starts rather realistically, I am cleaning my trumpet.
I get to the valves and there is quite a bit of scale and some kind of goopy sludge. Gradually, or maybe quickly, this ooze begins to morph into caterpillar like organisms, then more hair grows on them. I am not freaked out at all, since it all is seeming quite normal ( since it is a dream, after all ). Now I dispose of all but one of these organisms. This one is the cutest of them all. Now it has morphed into a meatball sized hedgehog like thing, but suddenly I am at a choir practice, letting several of the people hold and play with my little hedgehog like thing.
I had to take it back, but it was not done morphing. Now it’s getting bigger and bigger and now is the size of a Norwegian Coon cat. Seems, in fact, that it IS actually a Norwegian Coon cat. Reddish color. It ended with him following me around wherever I went, right Rusty?MORAL of the story is, don’t wait too long between cleanings.
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@bigdub said in A little humour:
MORAL of the story is, don’t wait too long between cleanings.
...or don't eat a three layer hoagie and downing it with a pint of beer before going to bed at night!
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@dr-go said in A little humour:
@bigdub said in A little humour:
MORAL of the story is, don’t wait too long between cleanings.
...or don't eat a three layer hoagie and downing it with a pint of beer before going to bed at night!
Good to know. I'll make a note of that. Should I not play my trumpet right after such a snack, either?
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@bigdub said in A little humour:
@dr-go said in A little humour:
Good to know. I'll make a note of that. Should I not play my trumpet right after such a snack, either?
Nah. That's why God created spit ball cleaning options for the trumpet.
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Can't for the life of me figure out why this USED Bach Mt Vernon 3c Mouthpiece hasn’t been snatched up yet. Free shipping, too. And notice you can get a 1 yr protection plan for only $59.99. We all know how a mouthpiece can cost lots for repairs and upkeep.
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@bigdub Well, being located in Japan does give it at least $300.00 extra value, don'tcha think? BTW - There's another one from Japan for $668.00 + $40.00 shipping. Bargains galore!
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“HUMANELY RAISED”
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I just wanted to proclaim myself safe from Camp LeJeune unsafe drinking water.
You can all rest assured now, I'm fine. -
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Wife in front of the mirror, "I've got a big belly, my breasts sag, cellulite on my legs---Hubbykins, say something nice!" - "You've got perfect eyesight, my dear."
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Interesting analysis on why we forward jokes:
A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead:
He remembered dying and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.
After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road.
It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight.
When he was standing before it, he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side. When he was close enough, he called out. "Excuse me, where are we?"
"This is Heaven sir." The man answered.
"Wow! Would you happen to have some water?"
The man asked.Of course, sir. Come right in and I’ll have some ice water brought right up. The man gestured and the gate began to open.
"Can my friend?" Gesturing toward his dog, ’come in, too." The traveller asked.
"I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t accept pets."
The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.
After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence.
As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.
"Excuse me." He called to the man. "Do you have any water?"
"Yeah, sure, there’s a pump over there, come on in."
"How about my friend here’ the traveller gestured to the dog?"
"There should be a bowl by the pump."
They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it.
The traveller filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog.
When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree.
"What do you call this place?" The traveller asked.
"This is Heaven." He answered.
"Well, that’s confusing." The traveller said. "The man down the road said that was Heaven, too."
"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That’s hell."
"Doesn’t it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"
"No, we’re just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind’.
Soooo...
Sometimes, we wonder why friends keep forwarding jokes to us without writing a word.
Maybe this will explain.When you are very busy, but still want to keep in touch, guess what you do?
You forward jokes.When you have nothing to say, but just want to keep in contact, you forward jokes.
When you have something to say, but don’t know what and don’t know how, you forward jokes.
Also to let you know that you are still remembered, you are still important, you are still loved, you are still cared for, guess what you get?
A forwarded joke.
So, next time if you get a joke, don’t think that you’ve been sent just another forwarded joke, but that you’ve been thought of today and your friend on the other end of your computer wanted to send you a smile.
You are welcome at my water bowl anytime!
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A lot of people make fun of the state I live in. People from 49 states, to be exact….but recently I found out that New Jersey just missed making one of the top 12 states in the US. Here is proof.
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I have another Peary Gates story for you:
A man dies, goes to the Pearly Gates and is greeted by Gabriell who asks, "Who are you and what have you done?"
Impeccably dressed in his Brooks Brothers Custom Suit, he answers, "I'm a corporate banker. I have a Barbie Doll wife, live in a three-million dollar estate and drive a Rolls Royce."
"O.K., right." says Gabriell. "Go right in."Next guy comes along wearing his Nieman Markus clothes and says, "I'm an open heart surgeon, my wife was Miss Florida, I live in a One hundred and fifty million dollar house and drive a Mercedes."
"Sheesh" says Gabriell, "go on in".Finally, a third guy came along in a T-shirt, jeans and long hair and beard.
"And what's your claim to fame" asks Gabriell sarcastically."Well," says the guy. "I live in a cold-water walk-up, I car-pool it to work and my wife looks like a refugee from Greenwich Village".
Gabriell's eyes get as big as saucers and a big smile covers his face.
"Oh cool, a musician. Go right in".