A little humour

Vulgano Brother

Now that good weather is coming, time to get in shape!

BigDub

Try to guess which of these statements are true ( about me )

I straighten things on the shelves of retail stores. ( any )
I do not read the instructions on the toothpaste, except for laughs.
I replace the cap before I begin brushing. Always.
I straighten people's pictures on the wall, if I can.
I have a strong desire to correct spelling and grammatical errors.
Always try to divide things in half. Exactly, with no measuring.
Fold my pull over shirts in one action.
Read the instruction manual after using item many times.
Avoid calling the help desk, until all hope is lost.
Engage in conversation with total strangers.
Engage in conversation with repair men/women ( also total strangers, at first )
Always hope everyone likes me. Everyone.

Dr GO

Dr GO

tjcombo

@dr-go I have your diagnosis can I get a prescription please?

Dr GO

@tjcombo said in A little humour:

@dr-go I have your diagnosis can I get a prescription please?

The reasoning being, that perhaps, just perhaps, your insurance company will pay for it? GREAT IDEA!

BigDub

@dr-go
THERE ARE NUMBERS?

Newell Post

BigDub

@newell-post

Spoiler alert: The answers are the same regardless of whether you can see the numbers.

Dr GO

@bigdub said in A little humour:

@newell-post

Spoiler alert: The answers are the same regardless of whether you can see the numbers.

Ah but what's the answer for the yellow circle Mr Smartypants?

Dr GO

SMART DAD

barliman2001

A trombone player has just moved into a new home, and has invited a friend for a first viewing. The friend is duly impressed; but late in the evening, he has one question: "I don't seem to see a single clock anywhere... how do you tell the time?" - "That's simple" replies the bonist, grabs his horn and starts practising. Within a few seconds, the neighbour's window flies open: "That's monstrous! Such a noise at midnight!"

BigDub

@dr-go said in A little humour:

@bigdub said in A little humour:

@newell-post

Spoiler alert: The answers are the same regardless of whether you can see the numbers.

Ah but what's the answer for the yellow circle Mr Smartypants?

Use caution

tjcombo

grune

Youtube Video

barliman2001

A string quartet are on the road to a recital, and their car is run over by a big truck. All of them pass away, and meet again at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter welcomes them, saying, "Well, that truck somehow was not quite planned... as compensation, you can now do almost anything, rehearse without a single cracked note, play concerts before the greatest composers of all time, and they will applaud you... there's only one caution: Never, NEVER ever step onto one of those little black clouds."
And everything goes well in heaven. They rehearse to their hearts' content, and play concerts; at one, Bach, Beethoven, Brahms and Bartók are in the audience together. But after a few weeks, the First Violinist comes to rehearsal with a horribly ugly old woman at his side... when his colleagues ask him how that came about, he just swears, "those d##n b####y little black clouds... I stepped on one, there was lightning and thunder, and there she was." The other three renew their determination never ever to step on a little black cloud... but they get careless, and first the cellist, then the Second Violin appear at rehearsal saddled with the ugliest and most screwish women in history.
After a few more months, the viola player appears at the morning rehearsal with a stunning young blonde at his side, in an extreme minimum of clothing... of course, his colleagues are curious as to what happened to him... "Oh, nothing happened to me, guys", is the viola players reply. "It's her who stepped on a little black cloud."

Dale Proctor

Newell Post

@dale-proctor Ya gotta love those zip ties.

J. Jericho

@dale-proctor SMH

tjcombo

April fools!