Two old fellers met down town and were catching up since they hadn't seen each other for some time.
One says, yeah, I got a hearing aid and it is so great! State of the art technology it is so good I hear things I was missing for so long now.
Wow, says the other. What kind is it?
9:30.
Sven, was caught in a hailstorm while driving his Saab home from work. It was pretty bad, and looked like the dents were going to be permanent. He took it to a repair shop and to his surprise, the repair man said, “you can fix those dents yourself, you know. Just blow really hard into the tailpipe and they’ll pop right out”
Ole happened to be passing by Sven's house the next day and saw Sven “fixing” his dents.
“WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO, SVEN?”
Sven told him about the repair man’s kind advice.
“Oh, Sven, he was really playing a cruel trick on you. You have to close all the windows first!”
I wouldn’t say I do a great deal of flying, but with that being said, here are some things I have heard:
When I asked for a coffee, “I'm sorry, we are out of lids so the FTA won’t allow us to serve it”
Later I asked a real airline flight attendant if this was a real thing, and she said, “what??? I NEVER HEARD OF SUCH A THING”
Another time I asked how could I report that someone asked me to transport something for them without my knowledge if I would have no knowledge of it?
“That’s why we have to make that announcement”, they said.
On another flight, an announcement was made, “please feel free to hesitate to ask if you need anything”
I always wanted to express my feel for these civil servants we owe so much respect to....”THE BUILDING INSPECTOR”
By me.
This is the second time I have seen this in my neighborhood. I tried to get him to stop and let me get a better shot, but I had no luck. I imagine he has people wanting to do the same all the time. 
I saw an ad for a radio for 1$!! But the volume was stuck on full.
I decided I can’t turn that down.
A blonde guy is in the shower when his wife hollers, did you find the shampoo? He says, yes, but it says “for dry hair” and mine is wet now.
Same blonde guy gets home and sees an envelope on his front door mat. It says, do not bend so he spends the next two hours trying to pick it up.
Then he was on the phone with the emergency room, shouting,HER CONTRACTIONS ARE TWO MINUTES APART, WHAT SHOULD I DO?
Voice on the other end asks, is this her first child?
NO, he says, THIS IS HER HUSBAND!
Just brought this one to the client's home last night for them to see their commission in the proper setting. They were thrilled with it. Even their teen aged kids were amazed by it. I think they liked it. I was very relieved.
@dr-go said in How about a "Random Meaningless Image...let's see them string"?:
Was this on Tik Tok by any chance?
@dr-go said in Artist on BOARD:
Who Dey wants to buy more of Bigdub masterpieces, perhaps a Bengal Tiger as a thought.
You mean……like…….
Just finished some more paintings, for those interested….
This one is of a harbor in Camden, Maine. I was very inspired by a reference photo I used with permission from the person who took it.
A flight from Seattle to San Francisco was forced to take an unscheduled stop in Sacramento for repairs. There would be a delay of anywhere from an hour to several hours, so the crew told the passengers they were free to deplane but be alert to any announcements or messages to return immediately when it was ready to resume their flight. The captain saw Steve, who he had remembered from other flights. Steve was blind, and had his guide dog lying on the floor beside him. The captain asked if Steve would like to get out and stretch his legs a bit, and he said, no, I’m ok staying on board, but if you wouldn’t mind, could you take my dog with you for a little exercise?
Sure, said the pilot. Oh, he still had his sunglasses on, too.
Never has there ever been more panicked passengers and resulting cancelled flights in the history of air travel.
Connect the dots.
Finished this one recently. Our nephew took some great photos of Portland Head Lighthouse in Maine just a little while ago and I asked if I could use some of the photos. He was happy to let me use them. I made a couple of changes, as always.
Teacher: what's your superpower?
Joey: Hindsight
Teacher: that’s not much help, really.
Joey: I see that now
Re: Artist on BOARD
Here is my newest paining and video I just posted on YouTube for those who would like to view it. It’s about 3 minutes and change.
Here is another YouTube video of my newest painting.
Hope you enjoy watching it!
