A little humour

BigDub

@bigdub said in A little humour:

@ssmith1226 said in A little humour:

We geniuses should know better than to waste our time trying to stare at these visual puzzles and finally figure out there are differences all over the place!

I'm still on this thread looking for these puzzles!

Another genius thus occupied.

BigDub

I'm not sure if I should say hello, call the police, or bring her back to the Louvre.

SSmith1226

All the good knights were leaving for the Crusades.

One knight told his best friend, “My bride is without doubt one of the most beautiful women in the world. It would be a terrible waste if no man could have her. Therefore, as my best and most trusted friend, I am leaving you the key to her chastity belt to use should I not return from the Crusades.”

The company of knights were only a mile or so out of town when they noticed a cloud of dust approaching.

Thinking it might be an important message from the town, the knights halted.
A horseman approached. It was the knight’s best friend. He yelled, “Hey, you gave me the wrong key!”

Dr GO

Our member, TMD at the beginning of and now most recent point in his trumpet playing career.

Dr GO

What I felt amazing about the TMD in utero photo, is, he had a beard, even back then!

BigDub

Ole decided to buy a book for his plane flight to Minnesota, so to save money he decided to go to a used book store.
He was so thrilled to find a mint condition leather bound looking book with gold piping beauty titled “ How to Hug “- for only a dollar!
Wow, he thought, I better pay for this before they figure out it was labeled wrong! He figured he could always use some tips on how to hug. Who wouldn’t?
He brought it on the flight and started to read it.
The person sitting next to him saw it and said, “hey, man, how come you're reading the 8th volume of the encyclopedia?”

Shifty

@bigdub Aargh. Took me a minute.

tjcombo

SSmith1226

@tjcombo

Dr GO

@tjcombo said in A little humour:

I actually applied to be a roller, and they accepted my application as I have served as such a role modal for the profession (and I make more money than in my current gig).

Shifty

I found this on a cigar forum, but it reminds me of some (or a lot) of the threads and "discussions" over on TH.

**A day in the life of a forum admin/moderator

Q: How many people does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

17 purists who use candles and are offended by light bulb discussions.

6 to argue over whether it’s ‘lightbulb’ or ‘light bulb’.

Another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid for correcting grammar.

22 to tell THOSE 6 to stop being jack@sses.

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is ‘lamp’.

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that ‘light bulb’ is perfectly correct.

249 to post memes and GIFs.

19 to post that this page is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a light bulb page.

11 to defend the posting to this page saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant here.

36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty.

7 to ask if the brands of light bulbs used are worth the money.

19 to tell them that if they like the light bulbs, buy them.

5 People to post pics of their own light bulbs.

15 People to post “I can’t see S$%^!” and use their own light bulbs.

7 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs.

4 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URLs.

5 to post to the page that they will no longer post or are leaving because they cannot handle the $!%cking light bulb controversy.

4 to say “Didn’t we go through this already a short time ago?”.

13 to say “Do a search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs”.

1 to bring politics into the discussion by adding that (insert politician of choice) isn’t the brightest bulb.

4 more to get into personal attacks over their political views.

5 admins to ban the light bulb posters who took it all too seriously.

1 late arrival to comment on the original post 6 months later and start it all over again.

Dr GO

What did zero say to eight?

Nice Belt!

BigDub

@dr-go said in A little humour:

What did zero say to eight?

Nice Belt!
Good one. But what’s a modal?

BigDub

We have all heard the scientific fact that 90% of your body's heat is lost through the top of your head. At least that’s what I thought I heard.
Well, I’m here to tell you, when I went outside to try it in this morning’s 13° air with a pair of gym shorts and a good warm hat, I did not feel 90% warm. I would say I didn’t even feel 10% warm. Just so you know:
Fair warning. Do not attempt.

Dr GO

@bigdub said in A little humour:

We have all heard the scientific fact that 90% of your body's heat is lost through the top of your head. At least that’s what I thought I heard.
Well, I’m here to tell you, when I went outside to try it in this morning’s 13° air with a pair of gym shorts and a good warm hat, I did not feel 90% warm. I would say I didn’t even feel 10% warm. Just so you know:
Fair warning. Do not attempt.

My head is so big I have to wear a jock strap and condom to stay warm!

BigDub

@dr-go said in A little humour:

@bigdub said in A little humour:

We have all heard the scientific fact that 90% of your body's heat is lost through the top of your head. At least that’s what I thought I heard.
Well, I’m here to tell you, when I went outside to try it in this morning’s 13° air with a pair of gym shorts and a good warm hat, I did not feel 90% warm. I would say I didn’t even feel 10% warm. Just so you know:
Fair warning. Do not attempt.

My head is so big I have to wear a jock strap and condom to stay warm!

Thank you.

I will now schedule therapy to help me remove that image from my subconscious mind. It may take a while......

BigDub

I am no expert on US Geography, though I have some idea which states are where. And I'm no genius on routing or shipping.
Still, shouldn’t the post office have some kind of clue that this may not be the shortest distance between Wisconsin and NJ?

grune

tjcombo

SSmith1226

@tjcombo
You must be very Devo-ted to this breed.