Posts made by BigDub

Here's another to scrutinize at your leisure

@SSmith1226 said

Who do you expect would have any experience in that territory?

I’m pretty sure it’s a trap. Don’t take the bait.
This is coming from an unqualified, non expert.

@Dr-GO said in A little humour:

@BigDub said in A little humour:

@Tobylou8 said in A little humour:

I had a chicken that could count her own eggs! She was a mathemachicken.

That was not eggs actly what I was thinking

Ahh... but the yolks on you then!

Did you know that it’s impossible to fry an egg “sunnyside up” without a lid on the frying pan in Leadville, Colorado?
I did. I was there. They explained it to me.
Also, you can’t fry an egg on the surface of the sun. Just saying.

@Dr-Mark said in A little humour:

Hi Dr-GO,
The bottom of the brain appears to have been sliced so it will sit. Then again, I've never seen a brain the same color as Tang.

Tang you very much for that enlightenment.
You doctors crack me up

@Tobylou8 said in A little humour:

I had a chicken that could count her own eggs! She was a mathemachicken.

That was not eggs actly what I was thinking

One of my friends who is a very, very good photographer also won for his entry in the professional photography category.
He and I often discuss the advantages and disadvantages of photography vs. my style of realistic painting.
He says, ."you can leave out whatever you don’t want in the scene, but I have to work around things and take it as it appears"
I kiddingly answer, "yeah, maybe so, but the stuff I DO put in my pictures doesn't simply appear on the canvas with the click of a shutter, does it?"
Truthfully we both enjoy each other's work and are very good friends. It’s also interesting that he prefers very moody, in-between level, low contrast light, almost mysterious and ethereal, whereas I often tell him I prefer directional bright sunny Lighting with the highest contrast I can get.

I entered this recent painting in my County Senior Art Show in the professional Acrylic painting category. It was awarded first place. Now it goes into the State exhibit. Two years ago my entry won first place in the entire state. We'll see how it goes this year. You never know how a judge will feel about your particular style and subject matter.....

A US Marine retires after a long and successful career and takes on a new career as an inner city high school teacher.
He had ended his Marine service with a serious back injury and started his new job with a full torso plaster cast. It fit under his dress shirt and couldn’t even be detected.
The first day, he had been given a class that was notorious for giving every previous teacher terrible time.
Our Marine starts out his first day with this challenging class by opening the window for some fresh air. The wind came in so strong it blew his tie sideways so he grabbed the stapler, opened it up and stapled his tie to his chest.
No one in the class ever gave him any trouble at all the whole year.

@SSmith1226 said in A little humour:

Meet Your Second Wife SNL Style

This.
Is why it’s best to be in the dark about the future! We have enough to handle with the present, and of course, the past, too.

@moshe said in Artist on BOARD:

@BigDub said in Artist on BOARD:

Here's another one, if you please.......

I am still stunned by how beautiful those paintings are.

Some of them remind me of being on my grandparents' farm 60 years ago,
a time and place that I miss so much it moves me to tears.

So your paintings not only speak to my eyes,
they even speak to my heart.

I seriously thank you for blessing me with a few moments of wonderful memories that your paintings induce.

Morris / moshe

Wow, that is the best kind of comment anyone could say to me. I feel like my efforts are touching the heart.
I am very humbled, indeed.

The blonde was talking on the phone with the home improvement store, and here is her end of the conversation:
Yes. Of course. Sure. Absolutely, very happy with the windows. Wait, what? You have to be kidding!
Absolutely not. Go ahead, take me to court, I'm not paying a cent! You said these windows would pay for themselves in five years, so in a little more than four years we should be all squared away.
Good bye.

When I was still working, one of my friends was the maintenance person for the same store I worked in.
A woman in one of the departments was never comfortable with the temperature. It was either too hot or too cold. She constantly demanded, pleaded with my friend to do something about it......every day. At least.
One day, he decided to surprise her and showed her that he had installed her own thermostat, right there on the column near her work area. See, he said, turn it this way and it will get warmer, and this way, to the left, it will get cooler, just like that!
She never, ever, complained again.
End of story.
Not so fast, there. He, my friend, never wired it to anything...and when she retired, he gave her the thermostat in a box with a bow on it. Here. Now you can be comfortable wherever you go, he said.

Here's another one, if you please.......

@Dr-Mark said in A little humour:

Hi Tobylou8,
Something a lot of people don't realize;
You don't need a parachute to skydive.
You need a parachute to skydive twice!

And, furthermore, people can survive a fall from many thousands of feet. It’s the sudden stop at the end that seems to be the problem.

OK, everyone- it's time for another one. This one was done as a wedding gift for a nephew and this is what they wanted.

@tjcombo said in A little humour:

@SSmith1226
I thought the Google translation was flawless

Precisely

Also. That is proof of how bad Google translate can be at its worst.
I use it, but find myself very disappointed most of the time.
For Spanish, I usually make changes afterward to make it more conversational. You can’t use English grammar and sentence structure when translating from other languages which do not use English grammar rules.

@Dr-Mark said in Artist on BOARD:

@BigDub
Unfortunately, when it comes to painting (unless its a wall) my lightbulb is burned out

Maybe. But you're a Dr, Dr Mark. Remember that.

@tjcombo said in A little humour:

@administrator "humour' is something that amuses me - like American spelling

Yeah, we’re like that.