A little humour
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Does a large bore make you sleepy?
What do sheep count?
What does Dracula count?
Nothing exceeds like excess.
Practice makes perfect. Nobody’s perfect. In that case, Nobody practices.
"Nothing rhymes with orange"...no it doesn’t. -
@BigDub said in A little humour:
Does a large bore make you sleepy?
What do sheep count?
What does Dracula count?
Nothing exceeds like excess.
Practice makes perfect. Nobody’s perfect. In that case, Nobody practices.
"Nothing rhymes with orange"...no it doesn’t.Encore !!!
Encore !!!
Encore !!!Morris / moshe
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Friends of mine just got back from a cruise. Said they bought a slice of pie for $3.00 in Jamaica, but paid over $7.00 for the same pie in the Bahamas.
Anyway, those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
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@neal085 said in A little humour:
Friends of mine just got back from a cruise. Said they bought a slice of pie for $3.00 in Jamaica, but paid over $7.00 for the same pie in the Bahamas.
Anyway, those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
And I thought that my puns were bad
I never saw it coming ...
Morris / moshe
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@moshe said in A little humour:
@neal085 said in A little humour:
Friends of mine just got back from a cruise. Said they bought a slice of pie for $3.00 in Jamaica, but paid over $7.00 for the same pie in the Bahamas.
Anyway, those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
And I thought that my puns were bad
I never saw it coming ...
Morris / moshe
In the world of Puns, bad is good, smelly is swell-ie.
The less sophistication it possesses, the higher the elevation to which it rises.
At least that is what I say to defend my own puns.
And, lastly, if one is easily embarrassed, one had better not enter the arena of puns. -
@BigDub said in A little humour:
@moshe said in A little humour:
@neal085 said in A little humour:
Friends of mine just got back from a cruise. Said they bought a slice of pie for $3.00 in Jamaica, but paid over $7.00 for the same pie in the Bahamas.
Anyway, those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
And I thought that my puns were bad
I never saw it coming ...
Morris / moshe
In the world of Puns, bad is good, smelly is swell-ie.
The less sophistication it possesses, the higher the elevation to which it rises.
At least that is what I say to defend my own puns.
And, lastly, if one is easily embarrassed, one had better not enter the arena of puns.There are arenas of puns?
Pun gladiators?
Pun matadors?
Peanut vendors?
Morris / moshe
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@moshe said in A little humour:
@BigDub said in A little humour:
@moshe said in A little humour:
@neal085 said in A little humour:
Friends of mine just got back from a cruise. Said they bought a slice of pie for $3.00 in Jamaica, but paid over $7.00 for the same pie in the Bahamas.
Anyway, those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
And I thought that my puns were bad
I never saw it coming ...
Morris / moshe
In the world of Puns, bad is good, smelly is swell-ie.
The less sophistication it possesses, the higher the elevation to which it rises.
At least that is what I say to defend my own puns.
And, lastly, if one is easily embarrassed, one had better not enter the arena of puns.There are arenas of puns?
Pun gladiators?
Pun matadors?
Peanut vendors?
Morris / moshe
Well.......in a manner of speaking......yes.....
And I had already used, "world of puns" so I resisted the lazy approach and came up with another nomenclature (how'd you like that description?) .
And as far as gladiators, maybe more like couch pertaters.
Instead of Matadors, maybe Bull throwers?
Peanut venders? I don’t know, you can’t spell PUN without them letters right there. -
@BigDub said in A little humour:
@moshe said in A little humour:
@BigDub said in A little humour:
@moshe said in A little humour:
@neal085 said in A little humour:
Friends of mine just got back from a cruise. Said they bought a slice of pie for $3.00 in Jamaica, but paid over $7.00 for the same pie in the Bahamas.
Anyway, those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
And I thought that my puns were bad
I never saw it coming ...
Morris / moshe
In the world of Puns, bad is good, smelly is swell-ie.
The less sophistication it possesses, the higher the elevation to which it rises.
At least that is what I say to defend my own puns.
And, lastly, if one is easily embarrassed, one had better not enter the arena of puns.There are arenas of puns?
Pun gladiators?
Pun matadors?
Peanut vendors?
Morris / moshe
Well.......in a manner of speaking......yes.....
And I had already used, "world of puns" so I resisted the lazy approach and came up with another nomenclature (how'd you like that description?) .
And as far as gladiators, maybe more like couch pertaters.
Instead of Matadors, maybe Bull throwers?
Peanut venders? I don’t know, you can’t spell PUN without them letters right there.For those who are not multi-lingual like I am,
"matador" is French for "I love me"
and "gladitaters" is Arkansas for "happy mountain oysters".
I don't mean to brag,
but I am completely illiterate in 27 languages.Morris / moshe
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@moshe said in A little humour:
@BigDub said in A little humour:
@moshe said in A little humour:
@BigDub said in A little humour:
@moshe said in A little humour:
@neal085 said in A little humour:
Friends of mine just got back from a cruise. Said they bought a slice of pie for $3.00 in Jamaica, but paid over $7.00 for the same pie in the Bahamas.
Anyway, those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
And I thought that my puns were bad
I never saw it coming ...
Morris / moshe
In the world of Puns, bad is good, smelly is swell-ie.
The less sophistication it possesses, the higher the elevation to which it rises.
At least that is what I say to defend my own puns.
And, lastly, if one is easily embarrassed, one had better not enter the arena of puns.There are arenas of puns?
Pun gladiators?
Pun matadors?
Peanut vendors?
Morris / moshe
Well.......in a manner of speaking......yes.....
And I had already used, "world of puns" so I resisted the lazy approach and came up with another nomenclature (how'd you like that description?) .
And as far as gladiators, maybe more like couch pertaters.
Instead of Matadors, maybe Bull throwers?
Peanut venders? I don’t know, you can’t spell PUN without them letters right there.For those who are not multi-lingual like I am,
"matador" is French for "I love me"
and "gladitaters" is Arkansas for "happy mountain oysters".
I don't mean to brag,
but I am completely illiterate in 27 languages.Morris / moshe
Well, I’m 67 but I read at a 70 yr old’s level
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complaint:
I receive at least 10 emails every day offering to treat "E.D."
Who told?
Did someone leak my medical records to the marketers?
If they really wanted to treat my ED,
they would send me a 21-year-old blonde...(and note that I said blonde, not blond, that's important...)
https://grammarist.com/usage/blond-blonde/That link says that I am "sexist" for using the word "blonde"...
Morris / moshe
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@J-Jericho said in A little humour:
Where's the strawberry preserves ?
Even Sarah Lee knows that I want strawberry preserves with my cheesecake...
BTW,
For people like me who are hard-of-hearing,
here are the hysterical lyrics to the song I have never heard before:
https://lyrics.fandom.com/wiki/Julie_Brown:'Cause_I'm_A_BlondeMorris / moshe
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"'Cause I'm a Blonde" is is one of my favorite songs, and Earth Girls Are Easy is one of my favorite movies. Julie Brown is just hilarious. She's come up with other creative songs, but I think "Cause I'm a Blonde" is still the best.
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Things believed by some blondes, ( Maybe, because I tried to convince some of my younger sister's friends of these myths growing up.)
- If you are driving in thick fog, turn on your high beams and drive faster. The heat generated from your headlights along with the wind created by your higher speed will push away the fog where you need to drive.
- Pigs are really just shaved sheep.
- The Moon, of course, is the closest planet to the earth.
- We ( the US ) own the moon. Our flag is there.
- New Mexico is part of Mexico.
- Before 1960, EVERYTHING was black and white. no colors existed.
Sadly, I was only able to convince them for a short time.
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About 5 years ago I showed up for a doctor appointment.
I was taken to an examination room.
The nurse said,
"The doctor will be with you shortly."I laughed at her choice of words,
because from previous visits I knew that the doctor was 7 feet tall.She should have said,
"The doctor will be with you tally".Morris / moshe
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@moshe
A friend of mine recently went on a fantastic African safari vacation. One morning Bob was able to get up before everyone else and get a great shot ( photo. PHOTO ) of a bull elephant while still in his pajamas.
How that elephant fit into his pajamas I'll never figure out! -
@BigDub In the same spirit:
How do you get a giraffe into a freezer?
Open door, giraffe goes in, close door.
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How do you get a rhino into a freezer?
Open door, yes-
NO.
Giraffe out, rhino in, close door.
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@BigDub said in A little humour:
@moshe
A friend of mine recently went on a fantastic African safari vacation. One morning Bob was able to get up before everyone else and get a great shot ( photo. PHOTO ) of a bull elephant while still in his pajamas.
How that elephant fit into his pajamas I'll never figure out!Proof that vaudeville and the Marx Brothers will never die !
"Who are ya gonna believe? Me, or your lying eyes?"
Morris / moshe